While tootin’ around Facebook today, I noticed in my news-feed that people I know have joined a group called “IF 10 MILLION JOIN MARC ZOMBERG WILL BRING BACK THE OLD FACEBOOK!“, this was my LOI (laugh on the inside) of the day.

So first off, the most obvious…  Facebook boasts just over 100-million registered users, so literally almost 10% of users would have to join this group, which seems plausible on the surface.  However, consider how many users are almost completely inactive, the users that just come on to look at pictures of girls in bikinis and stalk people (like me), the please that just don’t give a fuck enough to join a group, the people who don’t circulate invites, plus subtract the people who actually LIKE the new look.  You’re left with well under 10M, not even mentioning the time it would take to circulate that kind of invite around Facebook (which would never happen) and the number of people who leave the group in the mean time.

Then there is “Marc Zomberg”.  Marc Zomberg wouldn’t do such a thing! Wanna know why?  Because if the joker who created this group is referring to Facebook’s founder and CEO (and the King of Dorks), he’d be talking about Mark Zuckerberg.  That literally took me 0.23 seconds to google.

I especially love the group description:

Today I received a message from Marc Zomberg the founder of the greatest company and he told me to make this group he wants to know how many people realy want the old facebook back, so he could bring it back.

Now we need everyone who want the old facebook back to join this group and invite everyone because he gave us only 20 days to do this.

Hurry up and invite we have only 20 days to do this.

As God did to Moses, the burden of carrying the word of the almighty to the people has been bestowed upon Jakob Pettersson, a young boy from London.  “Marc” went out of his way to ask this random guy to create a group on his own site, to protest his own site design (and INSISTED that he do so with COMPLETE disregard for commas and sentence structure!).  No, this makes complete sense to me.

This reminds me of the emails that I think every person I know forwarded me at one point, about Microsoft giving away thousands of dollars to people for circulating an email.  Just ignore the fact that the math on that one completely ridiculous, how would they even contact you and everyone else to send these cheques anyways.

Who falls for this shit?  Probably the same losers that call their friends and family and tell them they’ve won the lottery in England because an email told them so.

People just want to be part of some type of revolution so badly, it pains me to watch it.  This isn’t V For Vendetta here, and you’re definitely not Natalie Portman (because I’d already be trying to have sex with you if you were.  BTW, is she still dating Devendra Banhart? Because I will muder his ass if necessary).  Move on with your life! If the new Facebook interface is the top of your priority list when you’re visiting the site, then clearly you don’t have enough hot friends to creep. Get a life (or at least pretend to have one).